The Confident Believer

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One of the worst things we can do for our self-confidence is to constantly compare ourselves to others. Since every one of us is unique and different, comparisons only create heartache and false feelings of superiority or inferiority. Instead, we can concentrate on things that provide us meaning and happiness. We can stop comparing bank accounts, Ivy League schools, the cars we drive, the jobs and status we have.

Instead, we can live our lives and be confident in our ability to pursue what really matters to us. All of us have principles and values that we subscribe to. These are the core beliefs that shape us morally and ethically. When we are clear about our principles and values and we live by them, we develop self-confidence and resiliency.

When our actions are in line with our core beliefs, we feel happy, empowered, and at peace. When we fail to do that, we feel scared, doubtful, and timid. Make it a point to identify your core principles and values and live your life accordingly. It will raise your confidence like you will never believe. Movement has been shown to improve mood and confidence. Think back to a time when you danced, exercised vigorously, or did yoga.

Chances are that you felt great while doing it. Moving and being active stimulates us and creates positive feelings. It is one of the reasons that Tony Robbins jumps on a trampoline before he begins one of his famous talks.

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Make the effort to move more, especially in moments of self-doubt. Success is really the accumulation of smaller successes. By consistently and repeatedly performing certain tasks, we work our way towards our eventual goal. Along the way, we build momentum and build confidence. It is an extremely effective way to change our lives for the better. While our distant goals can sometimes seem too lofty and beyond our reach, when we complete small actions consistently, we know that we are like a car driving cross country, with the first mile counting as much as the last one.

Meditation is an extremely useful tool that can work wonders on our self-confidence. Meditation is to the mind what exercise is to the body. It trains our minds and enables us to observe our thoughts. This allows us to notice both empowering and limiting thoughts. It helps us to detect the mental chatter that constantly goes on in our heads, a lot of which is negative.

When we meditate we are better able to disassociate ourselves from negative thoughts and not succumb to them. Since we know that most of our negative thoughts are not based on reality, we can see them for what they truly are and not identify with them. We become mindful of our incessant mind chatter and able to watch it peacefully from a distance. We discover that, contrary to what our negative thoughts and beliefs convey, we are more talented, skilled, capable and deserving than we thought.

Learning to meditate changed my life and I still practice it every day. It is an investment that will help your self-confidence and make you happier. Exercise is another extremely powerful way to boost self-confidence.

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Not only does regular exercise promote a healthy body, it also is conducive towards a healthy mind. When you exercise, your body produces feel-good hormones such as serotonin and dopamine. You will look better and feel better. You also will gain a sense of accomplishment and this, in turn, boosts self-confidence.

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Lift some weights and go for a run and pay attention to how you feel afterwards. My whole day gets better when I exercise and I notice a significant difference when I skip my workout. Very often, specific things, people and situations cause us to have negative and self-doubting thoughts and feelings. These are the triggers that we need to watch out for. For example, your aunt Betsy might be someone who is always criticizing you, bringing up your failures, and, therefore, encouraging you to doubt yourself.

Perhaps she is someone you should stay away from as best as possible. Or you might notice that you tend to doubt yourself more when you drink alcohol, a sign that you should stay away or limit your consumption. Like habits, self-defeating thoughts and feelings often have triggers. Try and eliminate or limit them. Almost every time we feel sadness, anger, or regret, we are ruminating about something in the past. Conversely, almost every time we feel stress and worry, we are thinking about the future. That is why it is so important to be present and aware in life.

The only time you really possess is now since the past is gone forever and the future is never guaranteed. When we learn to be present , we eliminate a lot of our heartache and anxiety. This frees up our minds to focus on our abilities rather than our mistakes from the past or possible undesirable outcomes in the future. When you feel bad or powerless because of something that has happened in the past, you are not being present.

When you are plagued with worry about something in the future, you are not present. Be present because it empowers you.


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When we practice gratitude, we are taking stock of all the good things in our lives. As we know, we spend too much time focusing on what is lacking or wrong. Keep a gratitude journal by your bed and write down 5 things each night that you are grateful for. This has proven to be life-changing for many people because it forces them to adopt a new perspective on life. When you focus on all the right things in your life, you start to believe in yourself more. Alright, you made mistakes in your life. So what? So have I. And so has everyone else in this world. Realize that you are human and that nobody is blemish-free.

Forgive yourself for your past mistakes. Do not let your mistakes and regret weigh you down. By forgiving yourself, you unburden yourself and get rid of the excess luggage you have been carrying around all these years. You deserve better. Once you learn to do this and I am not saying that it is easy , you will start to see that your past does not have to dictate your future because your past mistakes do not determine how capable and talented you are today.

Helping others, especially those less fortunate than we are, goes a long way in helping us to build self-esteem, self-worth, and confidence in our lives. It also gives our lives meaning. When you are able to make a difference in the lives of others, you feel a sense of power. You start to realize that you have gifts that others value and appreciate. Volunteer for a needy cause or help someone on your own and notice how you feel deep inside. It is very powerful. Last but not least, learn to love yourself. Each of us is unique and there is nobody in the world quite like you. You are worthy of love so take the time to close your eyes and feel that love for yourself every day.

When we love ourselves, we treat ourselves better and speak to ourselves more kindly. All of these 47 methods will help you become more self-confident. You do not have to use all of them even though each of them has its own merit. You might find some more effective for you than others.

Choose the ones you think would work best for you and practice them consistently. The more methods you use, and the more you practice them, the more powerful the effect. Great, great article. You wrote it with lot of love. Thanks a lot.. Too good.. Thanks again. How to Believe in Yourself and Build Self-Confidence When it comes to success, nothing is more important and influential than self-confidence and belief in oneself. Seek positive feedback from others Ask the people closest to you to tell you about your positive traits, talents and skills.

Question your current negative beliefs and replace them with positive ones One factor that determines our level of self-confidence is our beliefs. Take tiny steps and make small changes Many of us look too far into the future and forget that a journey starts with the first step. Build momentum When we act and take small steps, we start to build momentum. Think of a fear you have overcome When we lack confidence and self-belief, we become fearful that we are not good enough or worthy enough. Do your homework and prepare One way to overcome a lack of self-confidence is to prepare diligently.

Change or adopt a small habit Habits are powerful and play a huge part in determining who we are and the type of person we will become. Focus attention on the solutions and not the problems When we lack self-confidence, we tend to focus on all that can go wrong instead of on all the things that can go right.


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  • Watch your internal dialogue The average person has thousands of thoughts each day and much of this is negative. Stop complaining Most of us know one or more negative people in our lives. Accept the current situation Another way to help increase our self-belief is by accepting how things are. Surround yourself with positive people The kind of people we surround ourselves with affects how we think, feel and act. Avoid negative people Just as we should surround ourselves with positive people who strengthen our self-confidence, we should avoid ones that do the opposite.

    Engage in activities that you are good at and enjoy Another method to improve our self-confidence is to engage in activities that we enjoy and are good at. Learn from and emulate others you respect and admire Closely related to the point above, identify people whom you admire and respect and learn all you can about them. Embrace discomfort Human nature is such that we tend to favor comfort over discomfort. Cut out negative and frivolous media and replace it with positive media One of the best decisions I made in the last few years is to eradicate negative and frivolous TV and media from my life.

    Stop drugs, alcohol, and other addictions When we abuse drugs, alcohol, shopping, or anything else for that matter, it is often because we want to escape reality, even if it is for a short while. Adopt good posture This might seem trivial, but it is not. View past failures as learning opportunities There is not one person in this world who has not failed at something.

    Visualize the outcome with emotion There have been many studies done on the virtues of visualization and imagery and it has shown to be an effective way to help boost self-confidence. Practice positive affirmations Similar to visualization and imagery, positive affirmations are short, positive statements that you repeat to yourself throughout the day. Here are some examples: I am capable and can do this I am happy and content I am losing weight and getting fitter I am excited and grateful for this new opportunity It is important to remember that affirmations are most effective when said with feeling and conviction.

    List your strengths As we have discussed, most people are quicker to name their failures than their successes. Change your environment Our environment can have a substantial effect on our self-confidence. Groom yourself Have you ever felt better after a haircut, a warm shower, and shave? Dress the part The way we dress also affects our self-confidence. Watch your nutrition Proper nutrition is another way to boost self-confidence that is often overlooked. Acknowledge your fear but do it anyway Fear is a natural phenomenon that all of us experience.

    Do one difficult thing every day One of the best ways to build self-confidence is to do at least one difficult or challenging thing every day. Write down your goals and break them down into small steps Goal-setting is one of the most powerful actions we can take in our lives. Forget what others think Ask anyone old and wise for life advice and one of the things they will probably recommend is to forget caring what others think. Stop comparing yourself One of the worst things we can do for our self-confidence is to constantly compare ourselves to others.

    Live by your principles and values All of us have principles and values that we subscribe to. Move Movement has been shown to improve mood and confidence. Make consistent and repeated effort Success is really the accumulation of smaller successes.


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    • Meditate and be mindful Meditation is an extremely useful tool that can work wonders on our self-confidence. Exercise Exercise is another extremely powerful way to boost self-confidence. Watch for triggers that cause self-doubt Very often, specific things, people and situations cause us to have negative and self-doubting thoughts and feelings. Be present Almost every time we feel sadness, anger, or regret, we are ruminating about something in the past. Practice gratitude When we practice gratitude, we are taking stock of all the good things in our lives. Be self-forgiving and accept your past mistakes Alright, you made mistakes in your life.

      Help others and be kind Helping others, especially those less fortunate than we are, goes a long way in helping us to build self-esteem, self-worth, and confidence in our lives. Enter email address. Welcome to Christianbook. Sign in or create an account. Search by title, catalog stock , author, isbn, etc.

      Homeschool Savings. By: Mitch Stokes. Watch Video. Email me when this product is available. Wishlist Wishlist. Advanced Search Links. Product Close-up. Add To Cart. Isaac Newton. Add To Cart 0. Evolution and Other Lies. Persecuted: The Global Assault on Christians. Other Editions 2. Friend Reviews. To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up. To ask other readers questions about A Shot of Faith to the Head , please sign up. Be the first to ask a question about A Shot of Faith to the Head.

      Lists with This Book. Community Reviews. Showing Rating details. More filters. Sort order. Apr 08, Douglas Wilson rated it it was amazing Shelves: apologetics-evangelism. What a fine book! Lotsa fun, and I will do a more detailed review on my blog sometime soon. View 1 comment. Apr 22, Dan Glover rated it it was amazing Shelves: atheism-apologetics.

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      This is a thoughtful, clearly communicated, witty and well written response to the new atheists. This response doesn't agree to argue with the atheists from the ground of their own assumptions but shows how those assumptions are themselves highly suspect and depend more on faith and less on observable, objective fact then any of them would like to admit. In fact, Stokes makes it clear that the new atheists aren't actually doing science when they argue for the non-existence of God, since that can This is a thoughtful, clearly communicated, witty and well written response to the new atheists.

      In fact, Stokes makes it clear that the new atheists aren't actually doing science when they argue for the non-existence of God, since that can't actually be objectively proven. Rather, they are doing philosophy and they are doing it very poorly. This book does a good job of exposing the flimsy philosophy of new atheism. As part of helping to equip Christians to be able to defend their faith, the author introduces the reader to the work of Alvin Plantinga, and to a lesser degree, Nicholas Wolterstorf and Peter van Inwagen.

      These are three very intelligent and articulate Christians who also happen to be stellar philosophers by anyone's measure and who successfully defend their Christianity in the academy. One of the key ideas Stokes brings forward is the idea of warrant. Plantinga argues and Stokes boils it down for the reader that there is reasonable warrant for belief in God and that, far from what the new atheists claim, and which they themselves cannot live consistently with, not everything ought to be disbelieved until proven by incontrovertible and observable fact.

      Stokes shows how Plantinga argues convincingly that there is much in life and thought that people, including the new atheists, take on the testimony of someone else or by the authority of a document like the time and place of their birth, or who their parents are. Stokes does an effective job of pointing out that so much of the atheist's case against God is actually just bald pronouncement and then a whole lot of yelling and intimidation to "support" their arguments.

      This book and the arguments and strategies presented herein are a much needed shot of faith to any Christian's head think "reason enhancing steriods" and its also a shot of faith to the head think philosophical "right hook" of any atheist who is brave enough to engage the arguments it contains. I wouldn't hesitate to recommend this book to Christians everywhere. It will also serve as a helpful guide to honest searchers and as a bucket of cold ice water down the back of the shirt of some overheated, tirading, cranky atheists as well. Sep 27, Cameron rated it it was amazing.

      Surprisingly delightful. Stokes brings Plantinga and Wolterstorff down for simple folk like me to enjoy. Insightful and witty. Apr 01, James rated it really liked it Shelves: atheists-and-other-skeptics , apologetics. It is no secret that since the twin towers fell just over ten years ago, certain atheists have gotten louder and much more forceful in their opposition to religion.

      The late Christopher Hitchens, Richard Dawkins, Sam Harris, and Daniel Dennett, are dubbed the four horseman of the new atheism and have set to work showing up religious believers for their lack of evidence, failure to reckon with modern science, and the manifold ways that religion drives war, injustice and cruel acts like Sept. In the face of such vitriolic opposition what are believers to do? Does belief in God even make sense? Mitch Stokes has written a thoughtful book aimed at bolstering the faith of ordinary believers by augmenting their beliefs in God with some of the thoughtful arguments provided from Christian philosophy.

      Senior Fellow of Philosophy at New St. If these names ring a bell then you know that Stokes has a good academic pedigree, but this is not a book of academic philosophy. Rather it is meant to present the insights of Christian philosophy at a popular level. Stokes organizes his book into four sections 3 parts with an intermission between Part One and Two.

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      Rather we accept certain things as basic. In fact, according to Scripture it is the Spirit that reveals Himself to us and not our reading of the evidence. In a short intermission, Stokes lays out what you can expect or not expect from an argument. In Parts Two and Three, Stokes engages the two main arguments against the existence of God from athiests: the challenge of science and the challenge of evil. He argues that science no where disproves God and that the inference for design may be made from many findings. He challenges the claims of purely naturalistic evolution.

      I really enjoyed this book and thought that it would be accessible to a general audience though not necessarily an easy read for all. I think that Part One, where Stokes dismantles evidentialist claims. I think his weakest section is part three where he tackles the problem of evil. I generally agree with his conclusions but he introduces the problem of evil as a cosmic problem the existence of parasitic wasps observed by Charles Darwin but then seems to restrict most of his discussion to human evil in two short chapters!

      I think he should have unpacked this problem a little more. That being said, I think this book is welcome apologetic resource for Christians who are perturbed by the claims of the New Atheists and other antagonists. Thank you to Thomas Nelson for providing me a copy of this book in exchange for this review.

      Apr 21, Henk-Jan van der Klis rated it really liked it. Stokes received a B. While serving as an advanced and senior engineer in Florida in the s, Dr.

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      Stokes took theological courses at Reformed Theological Seminary in Orlando. He went on to complete an M. Nick Wolterstorff in and an M. He completed his doctoral studies in Philosophy at Notre Dame under Dr. Alvin Plantinga and Dr. Peter van Inwagen in , prior to joining the New Saint Andrews faculty. What is evidence? Does evidence itself need evidence? Is it enough to take God for granted, or can His existence be proven? Stokes does some fine work in addressing rationality, logic and constructing arguments to prove something. Is the division between rational and irrational indeed translated correctly as the war between science and religion, ratio and faith?

      We really do take a lot for granted, without any doubt. From many sources design can be concluded. I preferred reading a couple of chapters, put the book away, absorb its message, and resume another day. Whether you agree or disagree upon first reading, this book has certainly food for thought and inspiration for the faithful. Each chapter closes with input for your arsenal, conclusions and main tenets. May this book help you. Apr 07, Luke Miller rated it really liked it Shelves: philosophy , apologetics. This book tackles the fallacies of unbelief in three main arenas - rationality, design, and absolute standards.

      These fallacies line up with three of the most common charges leveled against Christianity - belief in God is irrational, science renders belief in God unnecessary, and the existence of evil contradicts the very idea of God at least the Christian God. I am just a few books into my first exploration of the world of philosophy, so please accept this review with all the appropriate discl This book tackles the fallacies of unbelief in three main arenas - rationality, design, and absolute standards.

      I am just a few books into my first exploration of the world of philosophy, so please accept this review with all the appropriate disclaimers that accompany a newbie. I know from my other reading that Stokes tackles some pretty high-level concepts in this book especially in the first section , and although I did have to re-read a few chapters, I didn't drown. So that must be a mark in his favor, right? I really enjoyed the author's writing style, which helps when you're tackling a book on philosophy. I learned a lot about the history of philosophy, and more importantly, how it is inseparably linked to the history of Christianity.

      Along the way, I was introduced to some people that I did not know. People like Thomas Reid. So this book has been a helpful guide as I continue plodding my way forward. There are very few things I enjoy as much as chasing the footnotes in a good book. One last note. I really appreciated the tone of this book.

      Stokes meets the "cranky atheists" objections head-on, and he does this while frequently quoting their exact words. He does this carefully, clearly, and I think fairly. I will undoubtedly revisit the book or at least parts of it in the months ahead, and I am very happy to add it to my arsenal.

      Apr 28, Chet Duke rated it it was amazing Shelves: philosophy , apologetics. This is a valuable book. In my experience reading Christian apologetics books which has been somewhat disappointing in recent years I have yet to come across anything quite like this. Although not immune from critique is any book? Apr 21, Jared Totten rated it it was amazing. Every year there's a book that comes across my desk of which I have little or no expectations for but ends up being one of my favorite books of the year.

      In , it was Marks of the Messenger by J. Mack Stiles. Whi Every year there's a book that comes across my desk of which I have little or no expectations for but ends up being one of my favorite books of the year. While I had heard nothing about the book or the author, for that matter before receiving it, once I had picked it up and started in, I couldn't put it down.

      Stokes has now begun to level the playing field and not only show that we have reason on our side, but that the New Atheists should be ashamed of their scathing condescension and perhaps consider their own contradictions for once. If I may give a spoiler by way of summarizing the book, A Shot of Faith to the Head broadly covers three areas: rationality, design, and absolute moral standards. Stokes shows how the atheist depends on one or more of these ideas every time they present their arguments, yet all three of these ideas have no grounding in the atheist's world, only in the theist's.

      As Stokes concludes: "The notions of design, rationality, and absolute standards cannot exist in a naturalistic world, the world of the atheists. Without absolute standards—of which there must be many—their worldview would entirely collapse. In fact, it takes the legs right out from under such a claim. If there is no designer, then there is no proper function, and therefore there is no such thing as irrationality.

      Beliefs are neither rational nor irrational. They just are. Apr 25, Orbs n Rings rated it really liked it Shelves: reviewed. Interesting insight better used for contemplation and strengthening ones own faith. This book was very thought provoking and the author Stokes covers many topics including those common arguments atheists use when in reference to God not existing. Some of the topics in this book include views from the West's first philosopher Thales of Miletus to evidentialistic views used by Hume and Russell, the senses divinitatis by Plantinga, scientific views from Galileo, Newton and others including Plato, Ar Interesting insight better used for contemplation and strengthening ones own faith.

      Some of the topics in this book include views from the West's first philosopher Thales of Miletus to evidentialistic views used by Hume and Russell, the senses divinitatis by Plantinga, scientific views from Galileo, Newton and others including Plato, Aristotle, Daniel Dennett, Hitchens, Dawkins, Stenger and Daniel Dennett. Stokes breaks this book down into three chapters with one intermission which he titles, "The Art of Self Defense. Other interesting topics for me were on evolution and the issue on whether our universe looks designed.

      In the conclusion Stoke comes back to a point he made earlier about atheism being a form of cognitive dysfunction. My view on this is that the atheist might find this offensive. As no Atheist wants to be told something is wrong with their cognitive functioning even if it is due to sin. Although I found this book very informative I cannot see myself using most of the information in this book when presented with the argument that God does not exist.

      As I found most of the concepts presented in this book to lengthy for one to use during a heated argument. I would however recommend this book to anyone wanting to give their noggin some insight and overall those who would like to strengthen their faith. I was looking for another good read on faith and Christianity and thought that this book might be a good one.

      I like that the author is very structured. Mitch Stokes opened the book by telling about people being converted to Christianity and then later on being unable to defend their faith or even expound their beliefs. He also gave a history of known intellectual people famous for criticizing the Christian faith, quoting the arguments presented by these known people, with one common belief in requiring perceivable and tangible evidence of a thing prior to believing in it.

      Still on Mr. Stoke's being structured, after presenting the points of view of these famous atheists, he then moves on to present counter arguments to show how flawed the points raised by mockers of the Christian faith. Also, he sums up each chapter by take home points for each believer referring to it as the items we should have for our arsenal.

      What I do not like though about the book is the fact that I am no philosophy major and at so many times, I found myself reading the words and yet completely spacing out. I've had to read and re-read certain chapters to get the point. I guess I'll have to re-read the entire book someday to fully appreciate it.


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